Thursday, September 25, 2008

SWEET STASH

I am dead.

There is no turning back. My fate has been sealed.

My achilles heel has always been sugar. You know. The product of the sugar cane...the little crystals that go into so many things I love.

I don't drink. I don't smoke. I live a somewhat clean life, except for being a Cleveland Sports fan. (Inside joke).

Anyway, I can keep pretty good account of my eating habits when I treat the sugar like Superman treats kryptonite. But let me sample some of the succulent treats made with sugar and I lose all control. I am a porcupine at a balloon factory.
Less sugar means....less J.T.

More Sugar means....wide angle lens to capture J.T. on the boob tube.

I found out today where my boss stashes her bags of candy. She always has a bowl in her office and people stop in to grab a treat or two. I usually avoid it. Tonight, I bopped over and the bowl was empty.

BOSS "J.T...just go over and grab anything you want from my stash!!! "
TRIGUYJT "Uhh...your stash? You want me to know where it is? Do you realize what your doing"?
BOSS (laughs) "Sure... anytime you want..just go to (location deleted because some Fox8 people read this)"
TRIGUYJT "You sure? Ohhhhhkaaayyy... Thanks alot"


So I raided her stash..right in front of her. 2 hours later, I went back in a raided the stash again. I am out of control.....and....I...love it!!!!!!!!! Letting me know where the stash is would be like giving paparazzi the keys to Brad and Angelina's house.!!!


This stash I speak of?? Its no less than 15 huge Costco bags of various treats. Hard Candy. Candy Bars. Suckers. Lollipops. Its so immense, the diabetics go into shock being within 20 feet .
What to do?? If I quit my job, that would solve it, but.....nope....THE BRIDE would kill me.
If I go on a run, I won't think about it.... Yeah, thats it.
Gotta go....the trail is calling me.
Life's a Blast!!..a sugary Blast"

26 comments:

Lily on the Road said...

Now that's funny, hi, my name is JT and I'm a sugar addict....

pretend its not there...ya right, strap on those kicks and get going...

Mnowac said...

Ugh I am the same way. I have to avoid sugar, if I don't I eat it all the time. Unfortunately right now I am not avoiding it and eating it ALLL the time.

TRI TO BE FUNNY said...

Ahh...my big downfall...le sucre.
Usually in the form of wine and chocolate. Heaven...

Benson said...

Try chewing gum, sugary gum of course, to curb the raid impulse.

I'll take care of the stash for you. You can trust me...really, you can...I promise.

Tina Marie Parker said...

I feel your pain. Back into banking and the candy dishes are everywhere. You have the right idea, run it off!

Kim said...

Hey, I was just watching you on TV, thinking I "know that guy"..

Step away from the stash. Or make the boss change the location and not tell you. Or make her put a padlock on it or something!!

triguyjt said...

update....Have been at work for 5 hours and have not gone into her office.....

Just like from the movie.. What about Bob"

Baby steps away from the office...baby steps... baby steps......

Marcy said...

ROFLMAO!

Your boss is going to start charging you if you don't knock it off LOL

Unknown said...

I started bringing a big candy bowl to work and filling it up. While it seems like this should be a bad move for me, it works to my advantage. Everyone else stops by and eats it up. Perhaps this was your bosses motivation in showing you teh candy stash...

Charlie said...

Cookies destroy me. No self control.

Rainmaker said...

Operation Stash Embezzelment shall now commence....

BreeWee said...

just keep running... run from those little temptations!

Kevin said...

That is my achilles heel as well. If I walk by my coworkers desk with the candy bowl, it is hard to say no

Speed Racer said...

Nooooooo! Sugar is poison! At least go for the peanut M&M's or something with SOME justifiable nutritional value.

Yesterday I stood in front of the vending machine for 5 minutes (no joke) trying to chose between the Milky Way (bad) and the Kit Kat (rationalization: less bad because the wafer section fills volume that other, less healthy components occupy in other candy bars). Finally, I flipped a coin. Kit Kat. But at the last moment my finger jumped from the Kit Kat combination to the Milky Way combination.

The Milky Way was heavenly. My ass is now an extra 6" in circumference.

So I return to where I started: Sugar is poison.

I feel you, man.

Marci said...

Another motivator to hit the trails... go run... then hit the stash as a reward for your workout :)

filoli said...

I am still chuckling at "porcupine at a balloon factory..."

Brian said...

My wife buys tons for halloween. She hides them in different spots every year. This year I only found them as she thought I was done with running and went to get some of my gear. Whola. 8 bags for the little kids for halloween. Make that 7 by the time oct. 31st rolls around.

triguyjt said...

what..Brian...it will take you a whole month to eat one bag.....

strictly minor league....LOL!!!

help help.help help.....

haven't raided the boss, but I'm pimping candy to myself...I feel lower than a wall street investment exec...only much poorer still

Viv said...

HAHAHA on getting the classified stash information! Love the new header JT you are a serioud motivator. I always look forward to your coments on my blog. Tehy always make me want to brush off the dirt on my knees and keep tri-ing!

JenC said...

I totally broke down at Target last week and got a candy bowl. I then filled it with my favorite miniature candies (milky way, twix, etc.) and put it on my desk at work. I'm so screwed!

GP said...

There's really no secret about what we'll call my sugar issues.

But I did hit a sugar wall yesterday: after 5-6 post-marathon cupcakes, I finally started feeling a little sugar shocked.

It wasn't so much that I felt guilty or on the brink of diabetes, but that I needed anything that wasn't a decadent desserty treat. (Those cuppies, though, were interspersed with cookies and ice cream cake from a birthday party too.)

That break took a whole hour to get past, and then it was onto an incredible chocolate boulle. Perhaps I should find other ways to reward myself.... nah!

jahowie said...

LOL!!! You will be missing a lot of work if everytime you fight that urge you get up and go running. Your boss had better get rid of that candy for the good of the station.

rocketpants said...

There is someone in my office who keeps M&M's constantly filled in a dispenser and since starting work I just have had to say NO...because i don't want it to be a habit. Evil sugar...yum...love it.

Sarah said...

Ha ha ha...this is hilarious. Now that it's October...you're gonna REALLY be having a hard time!

jcarneyjr said...

I just finished two Reese's cups I found in my daughters should have read your post first. I have been really bad about the sugar last year and this year need to make a commitment to stop. I will join the 12 step group for sugar anonymous with you John.
Jack

Tea said...

Candy Corn and Peeps...those are my weaknesses. Don't think just because they're only around two times a year means that I don't have my own set of problems. I need to find a candy corn anon around here.

I even started carrying bags of candy corn for my long runs....I should have signed up for the marathon.