Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Consumed by Coffee

Cutting caffeine is killing this man. Fearing for my life and sanity, I vowed to drop the coffee habit... The caffeinated kind, at least, and see if I could survive without the ex-tra- leaded-give you- a-- boost -like- Cape Kennedy coffee I have been drinking in recent years.

The coffee comes from the fine, fine people at that Seattle company that has coffee shops everywhere. I mean everywhere. I saw a store yesterday in a shoe repair shop. They had a deal. Free heel repair with each latte purchased. Sorry..not true..but..hey....well....I think I was hallucinating....but come to think of it, I now feel, about 2 inches taller.

Monday Am I got up early....probably still affected by the 3 cups on Sunday, staying warm at the Browns game. I should also tell you I was in the press box, not on the field, so the keeping warm part was likely a cop-out..but I digress. Monday morning I ran outside...good run..love the cold, the snow..yep..you got me there. I am a sicko.
Lasted all day Monday with no crack--err--coffee and except for the blinding headache and the one point where I was speaking in tongues, I was just fine. I was losing all sense of memory. "Hey, who's this big guy wearing #23 for the Cavaliers"? "Hey he's good". So, aside from those issues I thought I had a chance to kick the habit.

But last night was hell. My dream....what can I say???? My wife and I were on a vacation at a remote paradise. We took mules up to our love cottage. Mules led by Juan Valdez. Scary stuff. The lady running the cottage was Mrs. Folger. She was a very stern woman, not like in those old commercials. Even scarier. The bride went into the suite and I walked around for awhile.

But when I entered the suite, I looked at the bed and there was "The Bride" sans clothing, but in a scene like that in "American Beauty" was covered in coffee beans, not Roses. I'm not sure, but I think it was Christmas Blend. Decaf Christmas Blend. She beckoned me.

The Bride
"Come here you big beast"
"Who??? me??"
The Bride
My, your a big strong man..whats your size??"
"Grande with the ability to expand to Venti".

With that exchange I woke up in a cold sweat. I mean, they say "Mountain Grown and they must really mean it.!!!!! " Man, this is gonna kill me.
I worked out this am at the gym and did 40 mins on the bike. I did not slide over to the "crackhouse". I am making progress... I'll keep you posted. Pray for me.


tracie said...

JT you are a nut but I love it!!!! Coffee can do CRAZY things to your mind. ;) When I was in high school I was addicted to mochas at Caribou. I would go through withdrawal on the weekends. :( Hang tough!!! :P

Steve Stenzel said...

Great dream. I hope you find some professional help....

triguyjt said...

guys.. I am beyond help..but thanks for the concern...
tracie---its the christmas blend that i love at crackbucks...

RunBubbaRun said...

I'm also consumed by coffee. I can't give that up.. Your have more will power than I do..

Good luck with that.. Never had a dream about the "coffee donkey" thou..

TrainingtoTri said...

You are too funny! I personally hate crackbucks coffee. Give me caribou anyday though. Trader Joes has a WInter blend that has cinnamon and cloves RIGHT in it. Shut up - it's the best or the best.

I try to give up caffeine and splenda from time to time, but never make it. I figure if these are my only vices I'm doing pretty well.

triguyjt said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
triguyjt said...

holding firm gang..day 3. had another wild dream... steve says to get professional help so I will and my next post might have something about it..